| ^_^! |
[Nov. 23rd, 2008|03:43 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | the 'Feild | ] |
| [ | mood |
| |  cheerful | ] |
| [ | music |
| | beats n shit go fuck yourself | ] |
No drama, no problems just smooth sailing.
A lotta bullshit has gone on in my life. No I'm not saying I'm at fault, and am sure not trying to talk shit, jus sayin.
Since I've moved I've adjusted quite well. Sure my job isn't that great but it's a job that gets the bills paid, puts cloths on my back, and gets me the things I need. I've had other jobs that could and should of done more for me but there was so much going on that money became my distraction. Now I'm where I'c comfortable, where I should have been all along. No bullshit, just a normal life the way it should be.
I've been talking to various companies, saving money and am on the route of starting my own business. For most people reading this you most likely think I'm bullshitting you. Think what you want, but meeting have taken place with various videogame distributors, magazine companies. Sometime by summer 09 I hope to be in talks about licences for a few various things.
My home life isn't to shabby. I've got trust worthy friends that I can count on. Mature friends with no bull shit attached. People who can handle themselves and emotions. People who won't pull shit with me. I get my space an that's what's important. Best of all I don't 'need to prove myself' to anyone you either are or you're not. Fuck friends, I've got family and no that's not literal but if ya can't wrap your mind 'round that then that's on you.
I don't plan on stopping. I don't plan on falling back. I'm not in the mood for peoples shit anymore. I'm not in the mood for none o' that shit.
For those of you on here who've called me a friend but never bothered to call me since I moved I guess friendship ain't that important to ya. I ain't mad at you, I hope you're all doing well, just know if I see any off you shit ain't the same. Don't say you never knew how to get a hold of me.
For those people (and you know who you are) that still have stuff that belongs to me I'd like it back please. I never said 'have this it's yours'. If you ask and I don't say anything it's not yours. I'm tired of playing phone tag. Of people getting drunk n stupid when there's shit to be done. Unmade phone calls and attempts to make time to hang out. I moved back and I have way more frinds then when I left...where's everyone on here? No where to be found. No calls, no messages. Nothing. People call me fake?? Yea, have fun with that.
My life keeps getting better and better, the sky is the limit and I'm going up! ^_^
A good day to everyone. I hope every one of you is safe and having a great life.
Have fun during the holidays. |
|
|
| (no subject) |
[Jun. 29th, 2008|06:20 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | 413 | ] |
| [ | mood |
| |  crappy | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Girugamesh - Kowarete iku Sekai | ] |
Not much I do anymore is of importance to me. It's something, but all there is at the end of the day is an empty, bored person going through the same motions every day. Nothing is in color really. Sure I can hang out with my friend and work out. I can play videogames and DJ. I play card games by myself. There's goals in my life that are coming to fruition. School is right around the corner, or so I hope. It's hard to tell if I'm depressed or extremely bored. My outlook on life and society is bleak anyway which makes things harder.
Living with family is weird. I live with my sister and her fiance. I stay in my room mostly. I'll hang out but not very often. Most of the time it's just me, by myself thinking. Writing has slowly begun to consume me. The stories of my dreams become the stories I write down and mix together. The memories living with family again are sometimes hard to deal with. I can't remember anything about my little sister but I'll say that things have started becoming a little less fuzzy.
When you look into yourself and base characters off of yourself you realize a lot of things you'd other wise ignore and put of somewhere in your head like fucking things up with the person that meant the most to you in your life ever. You start to see opportunities for things you could of done, but times passes and it's too late.
I don't get why I can't just be content. To live life as it comes. I don't really know if that's what I do. I often wonder just what the fuck I'm doing anymore and I can't come up with any other reason besides living. Living - a whole bunch of pointless motions to follow through just to reach a miserable end result. Yay.
The fun and interest meter is dropping dramatically. I wonder what's next? |
|
|
| ^_^ |
[Jun. 29th, 2008|06:00 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | 413 | ] |
| [ | mood |
| | crappy | ] |
| [ | music |
| | An Cafe - Escapism | ] |
SO it's not official yet, but it seems (given a few more months) that next year I'l most likely be moving to CA. After exsausting all the possible schools to go to around where I live, the schools I've had up as top picks are most likely going to take me. I hope I get in somewhere so I can leave this place behind!
My fingers are crossed! |
|
|
| (no subject) |
[Jun. 10th, 2008|01:05 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | Home | ] |
| [ | mood |
| | drained | ] |
| [ | music |
| | the GazettE - People Error | ] |
Talking to someone recently, I had a very interesting convo.
I've told a few people about the music project I've been working on, but I've been pretty secretive about it. Funny thing is, for one of the songs
the lyrics hit our conversation right on the head of the nail.
The first verse is as follows and all I'll give away.
We live under shadowed skies
The things we hold dear fade away
Everyone dies
The world we live in has dissapated
There's no script to this play
No beginning, no end
Emptyness...
It's that feeling you get
You belive, you wish, dream even
Hope for something better
You forget the people you've met
But you hold onto the lies they told
Hold on to the hate the hate they mold |
|
|
| Xbox live |
[May. 30th, 2008|11:21 pm] |
|
If anyone is interested in my Gamertag let me know, we can play a few games on-line!^_^ |
|
|
| For those who enjoy my writing |
[Jan. 7th, 2008|04:24 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | earth | ] |
| [ | mood |
| | artistic | ] |
| [ | music |
| | A Blade in the Dark - Dawn of Ashes | ] |
Ok so hopefully this works, this is my first LJ cut.
Yes I am aware that there are a lot of misspeling and grammar issues.
No I do not care, and no I'm not following up with this.
It's just a another spur of the moment thing.
Please don't steal my work!
|
|
|
| go vote |
[Jan. 7th, 2008|02:16 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | earth | ] |
| [ | mood |
| | awake | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Chain - Blood | ] |
Vote for me to spin at Darkstar this year. They have a survey up at their blog on myspace!
Chances are I've voted for you! :) |
|
|
| Venues |
[Jan. 7th, 2008|12:18 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | earth | ] |
| [ | mood |
| |  contemplative | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Angel's Trumpet - Gothika | ] |
Does anyone know of any Venues that can hold a fair amount of people in it and that is also relatively affordable int the MA, NY, CT area? |
|
|
| yea, I'm bored |
[Jan. 7th, 2008|11:38 am] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | earth | ] |
| [ | mood |
| |  groggy | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Gigahearts - Dope Star Inc. | ] |
1. How old will you be in 8 months?
20
2. Do you think you'll be married by then?
I hope not
3. Was yesterday better than today?
same as always
4. What does your last text message say?
n/a
5. Who was the last person to text you?
Chelsea...I think, that was a long time ago
6. Do you prefer to call or text?
Neither, Internet please
7. Do you have any pets?
No, I've wanted to get a snake and a Lizard for the longest time though...and maybe some more fish
8. What were you doing at 12 am last night?
sleeping
10. When is the last time you saw your mom?
quite a while ago
11. Have you kissed someone in the last week?
No
12. How many houses/apartments have you lived in?
5
13. How many city/towns have you lived in?
4
14. Do you prefer shoes, socks, or bare feet?
Boots
15. Are you a social person?
No
16. What was the last thing you ate?
Pizza
17. What is your favorite color?
Black (is a shade), Blood Red, Metallic Silver
18. What are you doing for your next birthday?
Heh, that's a secret, it'll be expensive I'll say that much for now.
If I pull it off, everyone is invited!
19. What is your favorite TV show?
Videogames
20. What grade did you make in Algebra?
Failed once, D the second time, I worked my ass off too!
21. Do you like coffee?
yea
24. What are you listening to?
Life Cried – Burnt to Ashes
25. Do you sleep on a certain side of your bed?
next to the wall
26. Do you know how to play poker?
No, but my friends and I came up with a game called Capital Blackjack which involves lots of betting and losing money if you're not careful! ^_^
27. What are you thinking about right now?
nothing
28. Any plans for next weekend?
work
29. Do you have anything bothering you?
A lot of things bother me
30. Do you smile often?
Not to much
32. Have you ever had a life-threatening injury?
yea
33. Have you ever been in an ambulance?
yea
34. Do you prefer an ocean or pool?
pool
36. Do you know how to drive a manual shift?
Motorcycle yes, car no...though it has been a while
37. What is your favorite thing to spend money on?
Video Games, Manga, Cloths and shoes
38. Do you wear any jewelry 24/7?
no
40. Who is the funniest person you know?
?
41. How often do you remember your dreams?
Just about every day
42. What is the main ring tone on your phone?
n/a
43. Skim, 1%, 2%, or whole?
2% or whole
44. What is the color of your bedroom walls?
dunno...wallpaper of some kind
45. Do you shut off the water while you brush your teeth?
no
46. Do you wish someone was with you right now?
no
47. Are you mad about anything?
...mad no, but I'm annoyed at most things all the time
48. Do you talk to the person who posted this before you?
yea
49. Where did you last sleep?
earth |
|
|
| Only in Japan |
[Dec. 31st, 2007|11:57 am] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | Work | ] |
| [ | mood |
| | awake | ] |
| [ | music |
| | the GazettE - Burial Applicant | ] |
will you find great messed up stuff like this!
|
|
|
| ~The enD~ |
[Dec. 31st, 2007|10:10 am] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | work | ] |
| [ | mood |
| | awake | ] |
| [ | music |
| | the GazettE - Chizuru (version 1) | ] |
It's my day off...I'm clocked in at work lisening to an awesome Japanese J-rock/j-pop band 'the GazettE'. What else is there to do?
I quickly wrote this (about 1.5 mins). A quick ending to a story I've never written. Obviously as an ending it needs much more work. Still, for such a short time, I don't think it's that bad considering I haven't actually sat down and wrote anything significant in quite some time.
Here it is:
“It’s cold” a voice as subtle as the wind whispered.
The rain echoed its dreary song throughout the foliage. The dark sky blanked out the light of the moon.
“Dark…so dark.”
A man sat atop one of the branches sprouting out from one of the forest trees, starring off into nothing.
An empty…endless gaze into nothing, a look filled of rage and hatred.
With his hand cupped over the cherry, the man took a drag from his cigarette. In his mind he reflected on his life. Nothing. There was nothing happy about it, no ‘good times’, not a single happy moment. Death, hatred, despair...was there anything else?
In his right hand he gripped the handle of his sword. Every moment he grew ever drowsier. His mind drifted, his life fading slowly but surely. The very weapon he had used for so long, through all his battles, through all the trials and tribulations. There was nothing left to feed the blades rage, the hate it embodied, nothing except what life force its master had left. The very weapon he used to cut down his enemies now sheered away at his own life.
“Katsuya, why do you rest here?”
“…”
Katsuya glanced upward at the sky. The rain fell upon his face, he closed he eyes exhaling a cloud of smoke.
“Katsuya?...”
“…There’s nothing left. Jun…it’s over. I will die here”
“Then, shall I end you life?”
Katsuya closed his eyes, resting his head against the tree.
“I…am done, there’s nothing more here for me. So long…I’ve fought for so long. Now there is nothing.”
He took a drag off his cigarette.
“It’s over. I pray no one else will befall this burden bestowed upon me. The pain…it’s all I can feel. So much pain let me be free of this hell.”
Katsuyas body grew limp. The rain still fell. The wind sang its song. Katsuya’s cigarette slipped from his hand, landing on the wet ground below. The cherry dissipated, there was no more fire, no more spark.
“So it ends.” Jun faded away in the darkness of night.
-----
Have a great New Years everyone and be safe! ^_^ |
|
|
| Stolen from eL |
[Dec. 29th, 2007|01:46 pm] |
This is an in-depth 2007 survey!!
BE HONEST
1-Did you kiss anyone?
yes
2-Did you date anyone?
yes
3-Are you going to kiss someone when the ball drops?
no
4-Did you lose any friends?
not lost, but I don't really have a time when I can see them or hang out really
5-Did you gain any friends?
I guess?
6-Did you do something new?
I don't remember
7-Boyfriend/Girlfriend?
not at the moment
8-Did you change?
not very much
9-Are you happy with the year over all?
no
10-What's the best thing that happened to you?
Meeting new people I don't want to kill/making new friends my own age
11-Did you fall in or out of love?
love?
12-Are you happy the years almost over?
...by mortal standars yes, on the same token no...that means there's another 365 days to go. I'm guessing the majority of them will be quite shitty
13-Are you going to change something about yourself next year?
I am who I am, if I change then I change, if not oh well :)
14-Do you think 2008 will be a better year then 2007?
well sorta, Devil May Cry 4 does come out soon!
20-Did you go on a summer vacation?
I guess Blacksun - does that count?
21-Did you lie to your parents?
no
22-Did you get into a fight?
plenty
23-Did you leave the country?
heh, I wish!
24-Did u have a good birthday?
eh I guess, I smiled some
25-Did anyone in your family get married?
no
26- did you get any taller?
that won't happen
27-Did you dye your hair?
no
26-Who did you talk on the phone with most?
Chelsea, Liv and my parents
29-Did anyone sing to you?
thankfully no
30-Did you sing to anyone?
I hope not
31-Did anyone tell you they loved you?
yea
32-Did you ever go to the hospital?
nope
33-What did you drink and eat the most?
food and assorted beverages :P
34-Did you change your top at least 8 times?
yes
35-Did you change your profile over 10 times?
no
36-Did you change your default at least 20 times?
yes
37-Did you get a tattoo?
no :(
38-Did you vote?
no
39.Are You Going To Make New Years Resolution?
those are bullshit
40-Did you stick to your new years resolution from last year?
I didn't make one
42. where will you be when the ball drops?
friends house
43. Do you think you will make new friends in 2008?
I'll lose some and gain some
44. Are you hoping to meet someone special in 2008?
I don't think it's going to happen for a long long time
45. How do you feel, another year has passed you by?
just that: another year has passed me by. |
|
|
| ^_^ |
[Dec. 25th, 2007|07:20 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | earth | ] |
| [ | mood |
| | tired | ] |
| [ | music |
| | awesomeness | ] |
Merry Newchristmakwanzhaunikayear!
^_^ |
|
|
| navigation |
| [ |
viewing |
| |
most recent entries |
] |
| [ |
go |
| |
earlier |
] |
| |
|
|
![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small}
jaice28's journal
blank